How often does your child have a meltdown? If you find yourself trying to calm a crying and distraught child more often than not, it might be time to focus on improving your child’s emotional intelligence. When we nurture emotional intelligence, we help our kids understand and manage their emotions, build stronger relationships, approach challenges with empathy, and self-regulate. Emotional intelligence can help your child calm themselves before they reach their boiling point.
Emotional intelligence and gratitude go hand-in-hand in shaping the leaders of tomorrow. If your child needs to improve their emotional intelligence, try actively practicing gratitude with your family.
What is Gratitude?
Gratitude is defined as, “the feeling or quality of being thankful, especially involving another person.” Philosophers have been preaching this concept for millennia; even famous thought-leaders, like Socrates and Darwin, have studied gratitude.
“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” - Cicero
Practicing gratitude simply means to pause and appreciate what you have in life, whether it’s something as small as a sunny day or something as deep as a love for a friend or family member. In order to practice gratitude, you have to focus on self-awareness, empathy, and relationship-building, which are skills directly tied to emotional intelligence.
How Gratitude & Emotional Intelligence Work Together
Emotional intelligence is our awareness of our own and others’ emotions. Not only can individuals with good emotional intelligence understand what others’ are feeling, they can rate their own response to react appropriately.
Practicing gratitude is a tool to help our kids develop their emotional intelligence skills. Gratitude requires our kids to pause, reflect, and respond, which are key aspects of emotional intelligence. By taking the time to pause and reflect on their own emotions, our children will become better versed in understanding their mental and emotional state, thereby regulating emotions and avoiding meltdowns in the future.
Practicing gratitude forces children to focus on what’s positive in their lives, instead of dwelling on negatives that may trigger a meltdown. Taking the time to be grateful spreads calm through our children’s minds and bodies, further preventing irrational and emotional outbursts. Try the following exercises to practice gratitude with your child– you might just discover that meltdowns become few and far between the more you practice.
Practicing Gratitude with Your Kids– Practical Tips for Parents:
For Ages 8 to 12:
Model Gratitude – Our children learn from watching us. Make sure you’re pausing to acknowledge what you’re thankful for throughout the day.
Talk about Gratitude – Consider discussing what you’re grateful for over family meals. Go around the table and have each family member say one thing they’re grateful for before you start eating.
Start a Gratitude Tree – Make practicing gratitude a fun project by writing down what you and your child are thankful for and hanging it on a special tree in your yard. Be sure to use eco-friendly materials!
For Ages 13 to 16:
Encourage a Gratitude Journal – Motivate your child to fill out a gratitude journal each night before bed. Make it a habit to write down three things they’re grateful for.
Volunteer as a Family – Volunteering is a great way to encourage your child to appreciate everything they have. Donate your time as a family and discuss what you’re thankful for on your way home.
Take Gratitude Walks – Make it your mission to look for things you’re thankful for while you walk around your neighborhood with your teenager, whether that’s beautiful scenery or friendly neighbors.
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